Salaam all, I recently took my practical driving test and I thought I would share my thoughts and feelings of that day with you inshaAllah.
On Wednesday the 18th I had my driving test. I had practiced all I could and now the rest was down to Allah swt. I tried to keep myself calm by telling myself that whatever happens it is Allah's will and if I don't pass then maybe this time I wasn't supposed to.
As I stood for Taraweeh that night my heart was pounding as I asked Allah to keep me safe on the road and also for me to pass. After praying I felt a lot calmer and soon enough fell asleep.
Woke up for Suhoor, prayed Fajr and tried to go back to sleep. All I could think about was how much I wanted to pass, not because I really want to drive or anything, but just because taking lessons was taking up a lot of my time and money that I could spend on other things. As well as taking up my parents time and my uncle's.
I got a couple of hours of sleep and woke up bright and early. I freshened up made wudhu and went to my parents room to let my mum know that I was leaving to go to my uncle's house. (my uncle gave me the bulk of my lessons as my instructor wasn't that great) She jumped out of bed very enthusiastically saying "we'll take you, we'll take you" whilst nudging my dad to get out of bed. My dad sleepily got up and before I knew it they were ready and eager to take me to my uncles house. While my dad drove us there, both of them were giving me driving tips and advice. My dad's advice was "don't drive how I'm driving" xD
When I got to my uncles house everyone was nervous for me. I myself do not really get that nervous because I know all I can do is try my best and leave the rest to Allah. My uncle gave me a quick run through on how to check the car and answer the show me tell me questions. I prayed Zuhur and my nafl prayer, I made loooooads of du'a to pass and I was ready to go.
I prayed to have a male examiner because I thought women would be stricter as they pin point every little detail, but, I had a female examiner (and she looked strict! you know the strict English teacher type) She was actually really nice she asked a few questions and the test had started. Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem I whispered as I walked over to the car and showed her how I would check my brakes were working, went blank for a bit and completely forgot that all I had to do was press the brake and ask her to check the lights but Alhamdulillah everything came flooding back to me. I wanted my uncle to be in the car with me so he sat in the back, the examiner asked for his name and he spelt it wrong, twice, that's when I realised he was more nervous than I was.
As the test went on I made some really stupid mistakes, hesitating more than I usually do whilst driving, the cars qued up behind me and started honking, trying to make me go, even when it wasn't safe to do so. The other drivers were getting impatient but surprisingly Alhamdulillah I was calm. After the junction the examiner asked me questions about myself to make me forget about the situation so I didn't make more mistakes due to nerves.
I had driven on all the test routes quite a few times (my uncle would give me up to 3 hour lessons nearly everyday) and the examiner took me on the route that I made du'a that I didn't want to go on because of the narrow roads. She took me on a mini roundabout twice and the second time I made a BIG mistake. Right then I thought that's it I've failed. I just felt like saying to her "If I've failed can we just go back to the test centre?" However, I didn't and just drove (a bit more relaxed now I thought I had failed), but I still had that hope, that faith, that if Allah wanted then I could pass. Even after that mistake I kept repeating to myself "Oh Allah all mighty you have the power to do everything and anything, even if the examiner has ticked fail, you alone can change that. Oh Allah if it is good for me, please let me pass"
We got back to the test centre and she looked at her papers and said "I'm pleased to say you've passed" I was so shocked! I couldn't believe it, I had passed after the mistakes I made I passed, with only 6 minors! She told me where I went wrong and said that If the other car on the roundabout hadn't slowed down and I didn't hesitate (which showed I acknowledged the fact that I should have stopped), I would have failed for not letting it pass before me. All I could think at this moment in time was Alhamdulillah! If it wasn't for Allah I obviously wouldn't have passed.
That day reminded me of all the tests in this life set out before me by Allah. Through different ways and at different points in my life He tests my patience, my faith in Him and my inner strength to stick firm to my beliefs, even if everybody else is trying to push me to do something which is wrong. It taught me that dua's are never unanswered but they are answered by Allah in different ways, ways which we might not understand at the time.
That day reminded me that Allah is the best of all planners and if things don't go how I want them to I just have to be patient because Allah has something better planned for me (=